Showing posts with label Joey. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Joey. Show all posts
Thursday, March 22, 2012
Moviesucktastic Episode #66: The Shrimp on the Barbie
Moviesucktastic forges ahead into new realms of visibility as co-hosts Joey and Scot strut their stuff across your computer screen while reviewing Cheech Marin's uninspiring 1990 romantic comedy The Shrimp on the Barbie! Tune and watch us work!
Thursday, January 26, 2012
Moviesucktastic #59: 2012 Oscar Nominations Show
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| Image via Wikipedia |
Joey and Scott take a few moments at the beginning of the show to talk about Scott's new job, his recent trip to California, his eager consumption of cow throat glands and his long term issues with ear wax buildup, before diving into the past weekend's Top Ten Box Office list. As usual, the Top Ten segment wraps up with the Finger List, and Scott trashing a widely respected film (this week's title to incur Scott's hatred: Schindler's List).
Schindler's List - Best Romantic Comedy Ever
After a brief moment spent lamenting the recent trend towards 3D in films (yes, again), and a quick verbal assault on New Jersey Governor Chris Christie, Joey and Scott spend the second half of the show taking a closer look at the Nominees for the 2012 Academy Awards. As well as the usual bitching and moaning about the Academy, their recent Ten Best Picture decision (Nine this year, just to be annoying), and hammering out the details of this year's live video podcast of the Moviesucktastic Oscar coverage, Joey and Scott touch on the films filling the roster of the top main categories. Tune in and get the inside scoop on who is going to win, who is going to lose, and how lame Ben Stiller is going to be this year. The time to prepare for this year's Oscar Awards show is rapidly dwindling!
Trailer for Every Oscar-Winning Movie Ever
This episode of Moviesucktastic is available on iTunes and Zune, or on Podcast Pickle, Podcast Pup and Pod Feed. If you are on the go, you can stream it on the fly directly onto your smart phone using the sweet-ass Stitcher App. And, as always, you can also download or listen to the show streaming at Moviesucktastic.com.
And while you're at it, be sure to drop us a voice mail on the Moviesucktastic Hotline, 908-514-4470. Call in with your Oscar predictions and shame us!
Monday, November 21, 2011
Moviesucktastic #52: Batman Returns, 11-11-11
This episode, Joey and Scott delve into the dark recesses of the new film 11-11-11. Not since Friday the 13th has a premier-weekend-opening-date-specific titled film been so eagerly anticipated by an audience thrilled by the mere concept of seeing a film in a theater on the date scrawled across the marquee! Does the film have anything to offer besides a conveniently coincidental release date and title? If by "anything" you mean moments of spine-tingling terror emanating from the masterfully crafted screenplay of a taught theological thriller, then the answer is a sad, whimpering "no."
But not so fast! Before delving into the Land of Elevens, The Movie Guys (Joey and Scott) examine the top ten box office hits of the past week, weighing in on the hits and misses, adding their own entries into this week's Finger List, and inexplicably remembering that episode of Silver Spoons in which a young Rick Schroder dressed up in drag so he could accompany his lonely friend on a date.
But not so fast! Before they can get hip-deep in pseudo-numerology, Scott diverges onto a path leading towards bitter rage and indignation. Having recently bumped into one of those vile, soulless bastards trolling the internet and acting like complete ass-hats whenever they should stumble upon those whose opinions differ from theirs (you know the type), Scott taps into his reserve of Post-Avatar-Aggression and swings long and hard at the Facebook loser who dared to imply that his dislike of the Tim Burton travesty Batman Returns disqualified him from being able to call himself a "Film Buff."
Knowing better than to get in the way of one of Scott's tirade's, Joey steps back and lets Scott take over for a lengthy and unapologetic rant against Batman Returns and those Facebook fiends who would dare question his film criticism credentials while defending such a steaming pile of cinema. Just to show they play fair, the Moviesucktastic Hotline number is given out, along with an invitation for Scott's newest reel rival to call in and defend his honor.Let us hope he takes the bait.
Finally, after much wailing and gnashing of teeth, Joey and Scott wearily descend upon this week's feature review, the tragically boring and poorly crafted 11-11-11, written and directed by Saw II, III and IV director Darren Lynn Bousman, and forever tainting the sterling reputation of the Saw film franchise. Joey and Scott spend a great deal of time struggling to come to terms with how hackneyed and cliche the film's plot is, how badly and ham-fisted the dialogue is, and how non-frightening the multitude of cat-in-closet scares were overall. In fact, according to Scott, the creepiest part of the entire film is how in-depth Joey became with spotting the instances of the number eleven being surgically implanted into the film's background. If you can't tell how this one ends after the fifteen minutes, you might be the same guy who defended Batman Returns as a work of cinematic genius. Scott ends their sad look back at 11-11-11 by recommending a good film involving evil religious cults, The Nameless.
As with previous episodes, the show wraps up with yet another installment of Scott's Sucktastic Theater, in which he continues reading from the novel which served as the inspiration for the film Gymkata, Dan Tyler Moore's The Terrible Game.
"Jonathan could literally feel the wild nervous energy of his pony."
This episode of Moviesucktastic is available on iTunes and Zune, or on Podcast Pickle, Podcast Pup and Pod Feed. If you are on the go, you can stream it on the fly directly onto your smart phone using the sweet-ass Stitcher App. And, as always, you can also download or listen to the show streaming at Moviesucktastic.com.
And while you're at it, be sure to drop us a voice mail on the Moviesucktastic Hotline, 908-514-4470. Especially feel free to call in if Scott spent half of the episode calling you a jackass. This means you, CA.
Tuesday, November 8, 2011
Coming Attractions: Action Jackson (1988)
Image via WikipediaComing up in episode #51 of Moviesucktastic, Joey and Scott weather the Carl Weathers vehicle Action Jackson, a sad and futile attempt of late 1980s filmmakers to recreate the gritty, hardcore magic of black exploitation cinema classics such as Richard Roundtree's Shaft, and make Carl "Expendable Co-Star" Weathers a leading man.Don't let the carbon-copy James Bond movie poster fool you: Sgt. Jericho "Action" Jackson is no 007. No sir, this tough as nails Detroit cop doesn't play Blackjack and sip martinis, he plays dominoes and cracks open big cans of whoop-ass, all while spending as much time shirtless as humanly possible. The future city of Detroit might need a Robocop to protect it, but the only thing this modern day Motor City needs to stop the evil plans of Auto Magnate Craig T. Nelson (and do you really need a reason to want to see someone beat the living snot out of Craig T. Nelson?) is an Oh-No Cop, as in Oh No You Didn't! Or, as Action Jackson would say: "How do you like your ribs?"
On a positive note, this is probably one of the few films in which Carl Weathers doesn't die. (Does that qualify as a spoiler?)
Friday, September 30, 2011
Moviesucktastic #46: Supergirl, Bad Movie Day, and Guest Author Don Smith
Image via WikipediaNow that Joey and Scott have mastered the fine art of recording their podcast episodes through the wonders of Skype, the next step seems perfectly logical: Conference Calling! And what better way to try out our new conference calling abilities then by inviting a special guest host to help review our latest Bad Movie Challenge, Supergirl!
Light years ahead of our previous lengthy interview with author/artist/musician/hepcat John Dimes (episode #26), in which we talked to John with Scott's Droid X on speakerphone propped up against the our Samson SAC01UPAK USB Microphone, our guest simply called us on Skype. Much in the same way that anybody can now, since our podcast was interrupted by an eager fan attempting to call the Moviesucktastic Hotline. Despite that little glitch, everything turned out great!
Which is more than can be said for Supergirl, of course. In order to help us review what is considered by many to be the lowest point in the Superman franchise (until Superman IV: The Quest for Peace and Superman Returns, that is), we were aided by the expert opinions of Don Everitt Smith Jr., author of the new true crime book The Goffle Road Murders of Passaic County: The 1850 Van Winkle Killings. Far from being just a New Jersey crime historian, Don Smith is also a comic book writer for the Bluewater Productions “Political Power” series (featured on Fox News), a freelance comic reviewer and Patch journalist, and occasional Guest Host on Blogtalkradio. Reviewing comic book related films and dealing with opinionated individuals like Joey and Scott is nothing new to the likes of Don, who was recently interviewed about his new book on Parcbench.
Adhering to his busy work schedule, Don was able to spend the first hour of the show with Joey and Scott, going over the Top Ten box office winners for the weekend of September 23 through 25, and earned the distinction of being the first Moviesucktastic Guest Host to weigh in on the Finger List, which also resulted in the first Finger List three-way-tie. He then spent the rest of his time sharing insights and thoughts on Peter O'Toole's professional low point (next to High Spirits, of course), the poorly executed and even more poorly received Supergirl. Don lends a past expertise to his review of the film, having previously interviewed Helen Slater, and being a lifelong comic book fan.
After Don's departure, Joey and Scott finish up their review of Supergirl. Both agree that one of the hardest parts of sitting through the two hour version of Supergirl is watching Peter O'Toole act his heart out, despite being trapped in a supporting role for such a crappy movie. You can almost imagine him interrupting every third take with "You do realize I was in Lawrence of Arabia, right?" It is painful to watch him emoting just as much as he did in Beckett or The Ruling Class while Helen Slater wanders around him trying to figure out what to do. They finish up with a slight reversal of Taking Out the Trash, in which Scott recommends the addition of some scenes to help round out some of the characters, grant the audience closure by tying up loose narrative ends, and padding the film's length with a much needed rating-boosting lesbian scene.
Afterwards, The Movie Guys move on to covering the preparations for the fifth annual Bad Movie Day, including a rundown of the five nominated films currently being voted for on the Moviesucktastic Facebook page: Van Helsing, The Room, C.H.U.D., Superman IV: The Quest for Peace, and Garbage Pail Kids: The Movie. They then wrap things up with yet another installment of Scott's Sucktastic Theater, in which he continues reading from the novel which served as the inspiration for the film Gymkata, Dan Tyler Moore's The Terrible Game.
As he left the room Jonathan's father winked. "When you've been with the Burr family thirty years," he said, "it takes more than a couple of men eating breakfast in nothing but black leather pants to astonish you."This episode of Moviesucktastic is available on iTunes and Zune, or on Podcast Pickle, Podcast Pup and Pod Feed. If you are on the go, you can stream it on the fly directly onto your smart phone using the sweet-ass Stitcher App. And, as always, you can also download or listen to the show streaming at Moviesucktastic.com.
And while you're at it, be sure to drop us a voice mail on the newly acquired Moviesucktastic Hotline, 908-514-4470. Just don't call us while we're recording. At least until we arrange a way for you to call into the show.
Tuesday, August 23, 2011
Moviesucktastic Episode #41: Virus
Image via WikipediaWhat's this? Joey and Scott in the same room recording? No! Wait a minute... it's a trick! It appears that The Movie Guys have finally figured out how to harness the limitless power of the Internet using the awesomeness of Skype, and are now recording episode from their respective shelters, the Guida Estates and the Wilson Compound.
With this newfound technological advancement clutched firmly in their hairy knuckles, Episode #41 of Moviesucktastic is structured around Joey's latest movie challenge to Scott, the Jamie Lee Curtis, William Baldwin and Donald Sutherland (which one of these is not like the others) sentient alien life form horror movie Virus! Scott doesn't consider it nearly as painful as some other horror films that have been forced upon him, but he and Joey still find enough to cover extensively.
Virus also receives the honor of launching the newest feature of the Moviesucktastic Podcast Pseudo-Structure: Taking Out the Trash, in which Joey and/or Scott give examples of what they would have done differently in order to make the film at hand more enjoyable, hence effectively removing the bad bits (taking out the trash... get it?) and creating an entirely new and less sucktastic film.
Also featured in this episode are the Top Ten films in the theaters over the past weekend, the latest additions to The Finger List, and the second installment of Scott's Sucktastic Theater, in which he continues reading from the novel which served as the inspiration for the film Gymkata, Dan Tyler Moore's The Terrible Game.
This episode of Moviesucktastic is available on iTunes and Zune, or on Podcast Pickle, Podcast Pup and Pod Feed. If you are on the go, you can stream it on the fly directly onto your smart phone using the sweet-ass Stitcher App. And, as always, you can also download or listen to the show streaming at Moviesucktastic.com.
And while you're at it, be sure to drop us a voice mail on the newly acquired Moviesucktastic Hotline, 908-514-4470. Tell us how much you enjoyed the ending of Skyline. You know you want to.
Monday, August 15, 2011
Episode #40: The Golden Child
Cover of The Golden ChildEpisode #40 of Moviesucktastic is a Casztastic solo episode, featuring Joey's review of Scott's latest challenge to him, the Eddie Murphy 80's classic The Golden Child!
You can hear Joey gush all over Eddie Murphy's comedic talents in this episode of Moviesucktastic on iTunes and Zune, or on Podcast Pickle, Podcast Pup and Pod Feed. If you are on the go, you can stream us on the fly directly onto your smart phone using the sweet-ass Stitcher App. And, as always, you can also download or listen to the show streaming at Moviesucktastic.com.
And while you're at it, be sure to drop us a voice mail on the newly acquired Moviesucktastic Hotline, 908-514-4470. Tell us how much you enjoyed the ending of Skyline. You know you want to.
Monday, August 8, 2011
Episode #39: Source Code, Skyline, Drive Angry
Image by Andrei Z via FlickrEpisode #39 of Moviesucktastic is a cavalcade of random film reviews, as Joey and Scott do what they do best - ramble on incessantly about films they've recently scene. Among the films on their unplanned agenda are three films that have been regularly trashed by other film critics, but have somehow nestled their way into the hearts of The Movie Guys: Jake Gyllenhaal's time travel train ride Source Code, the ultra-low-budget alien apocalypse flick Skyline, and Nicolas "I'll Literally Do Anything" Cage's gritty comic-bookish car chase extravaganza Drive Angry. Thrill to amazement of listening to Joey and Scott talk about films they actually liked! You'll hardly believe your ears!
You can hear this uncharacteristically upbeat episode of Moviesucktastic on iTunes and Zune, or on Podcast Pickle, Podcast Pup and Pod Feed. If you are on the go, you can stream us on the fly directly onto your smart phone using the sweet-ass Stitcher App. And, as always, you can also download or listen to the show streaming at Moviesucktastic.com.
And while you're at it, be sure to drop us a voice mail on the newly acquired Moviesucktastic Hotline, 908-514-4470. Tell us how much you enjoyed the ending of Skyline. You know you want to.
Friday, February 18, 2011
The Minority Podcast
360 Sound and Vision, an independent production company based out f New York, sent us a screener copy of The Minority, starring Billoah Greene and written/directed by Dwayne Buckle (aka D-Buckle). In the words of the promotional website for the film:
Hardworking African American citizen Jake Jackson is constantly subjected to racial biases, until he captures a wanted fugitive, then his luck changes.At first, your humble podcasts hosts were concerned about the implications. Did these struggling filmmakers realize that our show was dedicated to talking about mostly bad movies? Did the understand what the "Suck" in Moviesucktastic stands for? We were worried that the production company's expectations regarding our critical input (or more precisely, output) might be somewhat excessive.
Even worse, we became concerned that agreeing to review their film would result in a moral dilemma: Never ones to trash a film just for the sake of being mean or spiteful, would we end up giving a boring positive review that would do little to entertain or inform our listeners, who depend on our bitter hatred for films that fall below our rather shallow artistic standards? Even worse, would we be tempted to violate our journalistic ideals and give a negative review to a film undeserving of critical scorn and derision?
Fifteen minutes into the film, we new they had made the right choice.
Listen to the groundbreaking Episode #27 of Moviesucktastic, and find out why it is not only the first episode to feature a solicited review, but the first to ever start with an apology for the review to come. You can download this momentous episode from iTunes, Podcast Alley, Podcast.com or stream it directly at the newly updated MovieSucktastic.com website. And if you feel that our review of The Minority was unnecessarily harsh or unkind, be sure to let us know.
Tuesday, July 20, 2010
Inception: Planting a Clue in Sandy Kenyon's Dreamscape
Image via WikipediaThat's right, faithful listeners! Last week, Joey was found huddled on his own doorstep in the morning, covered in sap, pine needles and blue face paint, vainly attempting to nurse the sports section of the Sunday Star Ledger in a feverish delirium. He has since been reunited with his family, and while it will be quite awhile before he is able to speak of his ordeal at the hands of psychotic Avatar fans (the recovery and deprogramming sessions are a slow and gradual process), he has recovered enough to come back and be a part of MovieSucktastic Episode #18!
With Joey in rare form and Scott in attendance, Episode #18 delves into the land of Nod, following the escapades of Dennis Quaid and Leonardo DiCaprio as they explore the deep recesses of the human psyche through dream exploration a quarter of a century apart in Dreamscape and Inception, respectively. While much is said and other topics occasionally intrude (Honestly, you can't shut these two up!), the quality of both films is discussed and dissected, along with their similarities and differences, and some theorizing as to who ripped off who (most of the votes go to Wes Craven, oddly enough).
Differences of opinion also arise when Joey takes a turn in the Rant Chamber and goes on a mini-tirade against ABC Eyewitness News Film Critic Sandy Kenyon, who is apparently (and admittedly) one of the few people in the country stupid enough to be confused by Christopher Nolan's masterful and extremely straightforward screenplay. Also listed among his sins on the show is his purposeful misrepresentation of Inception's concept of the inner mind's dream landscape in an effort to back his "Too Complicated" complaints regarding the film.
The finger list also makes a long-awaited return, and Scott formally and publicly apologizes to the ticket girl at Becky's Drive-In for an unintentionally unflattering and inaccurate physical description of her in his review of Twilight: Eclipse.
Joey and Scott's heartwarming reunion can be listened to or downloaded from iTunes, Podcast Alley, Podcast.com orMovieSucktastic.com. Sandy Kenyon can be mocked and ridiculed both directly or indirectly at ABC Eyewitness News.
Monday, May 3, 2010
How to Train Your Dragon and Avatar Abductions!
If you haven't tuned in to the MovieSucktastic podcast lately, you might want to check out the latest episode. There have been a lot of changes to the show format in the past few months, but the latest change was something that nobody could have predicted. It turns out that MovieSucktastic co-host Joey has been abducted by what appears to be a militant faction of Avatar fanatics. While no responsibility has been claimed and no demands or intentions have been made, the audio of Joey's last known phone message on his way to record the latest episode (he never arrived) is damning evidence in itself that these Avatar-obsessed hooligans have taken Joey hostage in retaliation for past anti-Avatar reviews posted by his fellow MovieSucktastic co-host, Scott Wilson.
With Joey's fate uncertain, Scott does his best to keep the show going, promising to keep the audience updated on the situation. In the meantime, Scott takes the time to go over the success of A Nightmare on Elm Street in the weekend box office results, shamelessly promotes his book (Monster Rally, available on Amazon.com), and channels the spiritual energy of Glenn Beck for a very special Right-Wing Review of the pro-terrorist anti-American animated feature How to Train Your Dragon.
You're going to regret it if you don't keep up with the latest happenings at MovieSucktastic, either at iTunes, Podcast Alley, Podcast.com or MovieSucktastic.com. Because this summer, things are going to Suck a whole lot more.
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You're going to regret it if you don't keep up with the latest happenings at MovieSucktastic, either at iTunes, Podcast Alley, Podcast.com or MovieSucktastic.com. Because this summer, things are going to Suck a whole lot more.
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